Call It What You Want Summary, Characters and Themes

Call It What You Want by Alissa DeRogatis is a deeply emotional, character-driven love story that explores the messy, beautiful, and complicated nature of relationships—especially the ones that never quite left us. 

The novel follows Sloane Hart and Ethan Brady, two college classmates whose chemistry is undeniable but whose emotional baggage runs deep. Told in dual timelines—“Then” during their senior year of college, and “Now,” years later as adults—the book delves into heartbreak, healing, and the choices we make when love isn’t always easy. With themes of vulnerability, second chances, and self-growth, DeRogatis crafts a love story that feels both nostalgic and grounded in raw, emotional truth.

Summary

Call It What You Want opens in December 2018, with Sloane Hart looking back on a heartbreak that still stings. She and Ethan Brady weren’t quite a couple—but what they had was real, even if it ended in silence. That ache of the “almost” sets the tone for the rest of the story.

Rewind to August 2016, when Sloane is starting her senior year of college. On the campus shuttle, she meets Ethan—witty, confident, and impossible to ignore. Their banter is instant, the chemistry palpable. Soon they discover they’re neighbors, making it easy for their paths to cross again and again.

As they get closer—through parties, shared classes, and late-night talks—they begin to build something intimate. But both are carrying invisible scars. Sloane is still trying to trust after a past relationship left her hurt and guarded. Her parents’ divorce also shaped her cautious heart. Meanwhile, Ethan, raised in a dysfunctional household, struggles to believe he’s capable of real emotional connection.

Still, they push forward. There’s a first kiss, a memorable night after a party, and days of lingering glances that evolve into something deeper. Ethan encourages Sloane’s dream of becoming a writer in New York, and she begins to hope again. Their conversations go beyond surface-level; there’s substance, even if unspoken doubts remain.

Their friends, including Lauren and Graham, add layers to the story. Lauren—Sloane’s best friend—starts dating Graham, Ethan’s roommate. 

This creates a tight-knit group dynamic, with all four becoming increasingly entangled. As the romance between Sloane and Ethan intensifies, it’s clear that both are falling—but neither is ready to admit it aloud. 

Their connection simmers, intense but fragile, weighed down by unspoken insecurities and the fear of rejection.

By the end of their senior year, it’s clear something has changed. A miscommunication or moment of hesitation—never fully explained—fractures what they were building. 

Instead of confrontation, they drift. And then, years pass.

In Part 2, Sloane is living in New York City, chasing her dream of being a writer. She’s made progress, but the ghost of Ethan still lingers. Out of the blue, they cross paths again. The initial meeting is awkward, charged with the weight of everything left unsaid. What follows is a slow re-opening of old wounds and unexpected reconnection.

They begin to see more of each other—sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. The past bleeds into the present as memories resurface: that shuttle ride, those parties, the way things fell apart. And yet, something has shifted.

Ethan is different. He tells Sloane he’s been in therapy, working through his past. There’s a maturity in him now, a willingness to be vulnerable that was missing before.

Sloane, too, has grown. Through her writing, she’s learned to process her pain, to give voice to what once silenced her. Their renewed bond isn’t effortless—but it’s honest. They talk, really talk, for the first time. About the hurt, the fear, the love that never fully died.

As the novel builds to its emotional climax, they finally stop running—from each other, from themselves. Ethan makes a heartfelt gesture, showing that he’s ready to truly choose Sloane, not just out of nostalgia, but because he sees her, completely.

In the Epilogue, they are together—not as a maybe, not as a what-if, but as two people who have chosen to grow and love each other fully. Their story isn’t perfect, but it’s real. And this time, it’s just beginning.

Characters

Sloane Hart

Sloane Hart is a complex protagonist who grapples with deep emotional scars and the weight of unresolved past relationships. At the start of the novel, she is a senior in college, trying to move forward from a traumatic breakup and family issues, particularly the divorce of her parents.

Despite these burdens, Sloane is intelligent, introspective, and highly sensitive. Her vulnerability often manifests in her difficulty trusting others, particularly when it comes to romantic relationships.

She has a passion for writing, which acts as both a cathartic outlet and a means to understand her emotions. As the story unfolds, Sloane grows significantly, learning to confront her fears, embrace her personal growth, and navigate relationships in a healthier, more open way.

Ethan Brady

Ethan Brady’s character arc is defined by his internal struggle with emotional intimacy and his complicated relationship with vulnerability. Raised in a dysfunctional family, Ethan has built emotional walls to protect himself from the pain of attachment.

When he first meets Sloane, his attraction to her is palpable, but his fear of opening up prevents him from fully embracing the potential of their relationship. Ethan’s growth over the course of the story is marked by his gradual willingness to seek help through therapy and his eventual understanding of how to communicate his emotions.

His relationship with Sloane is central to his personal evolution, as he learns to trust and embrace vulnerability, ultimately allowing him to confront past wounds and move forward with her.

Lauren and Graham

Lauren and Graham, though not as central to the story as Sloane and Ethan, play significant roles in providing emotional support and influencing the narrative. Lauren, Sloane’s close friend, offers encouragement and acts as a sounding board for Sloane’s complicated feelings about Ethan.

Her relationship with Graham serves as a contrast to Sloane and Ethan’s, providing a sense of stability and normalcy. Graham, Ethan’s roommate, is depicted as a grounding figure for Ethan, helping him navigate his emotional struggles and offering a different perspective on relationships.

Both characters help to highlight the dynamics of friendship and how they shape the characters’ decisions, particularly in the realm of love and trust.

Themes

The Complexity of Emotional Growth and Healing from Past Trauma

One of the primary themes of Call It What You Want is the intricate journey of emotional healing and personal growth. Sloane and Ethan both grapple with the emotional scars left by their pasts, which deeply influence their relationship dynamics.

Sloane’s trauma stems from a toxic relationship and her parents’ painful divorce, while Ethan’s emotional baggage is shaped by a dysfunctional family background. As the story progresses, it becomes clear that their individual paths to healing are intertwined with their evolving connection.

They both struggle to open up to one another, a reflection of their own difficulties in trusting others. However, as they begin to confront their vulnerabilities, they slowly dismantle their emotional walls.

The theme of healing is further explored through their growth in communication, therapy, and Sloane’s writing, where she channels her pain into something productive. This theme underlines the importance of facing one’s past head-on in order to build a healthier, more fulfilling future.

The Interplay Between Love, Timing, and Missed Opportunities

Another dominant theme in the novel is the role that timing plays in relationships, especially in the context of youth and personal development. Sloane and Ethan’s connection begins during their senior year of college, but their relationship never fully materializes due to miscommunications, unresolved feelings, and their emotional immaturity.

This theme is poignantly encapsulated in the concept of the “almost” relationship—something that could have been, yet was never fully realized. After several years of separation, they meet again, and the tension between them resurfaces.

This time, however, they are both different people, and the realization that they were not ready for each other in the past adds depth to their present connection. The narrative examines how love can evolve over time, how missed opportunities shape the course of relationships, and how second chances often require more than just rekindling old feelings but a willingness to redefine what is possible.

The Struggles of Vulnerability and Emotional Intimacy in Modern Relationships

Vulnerability and emotional intimacy are significant hurdles that Sloane and Ethan must overcome in order to make their relationship work. Throughout the narrative, both characters exhibit a reluctance to fully open up to each other.

Ethan, due to his troubled family life, is particularly guarded, while Sloane’s trust issues make it hard for her to believe in lasting love. Their interactions are often fraught with uncertainty as they try to navigate their feelings for one another while fearing rejection or misinterpretation.

This theme delves into the complexities of modern relationships, where emotional vulnerability is often seen as a risk, yet it is essential for true intimacy. As the novel progresses, both characters must confront their fears, shed their emotional armor, and make the difficult choice to be open and vulnerable.

The theme highlights the emotional labor involved in relationships, particularly the work required to build trust and intimacy.

The Role of Personal Identity and Self-Discovery in Romantic Relationships

A major thematic exploration in Call It What You Want is the idea of personal identity and self-discovery, particularly how these elements influence romantic relationships. Both Sloane and Ethan are on journeys of self-discovery, trying to figure out who they are as individuals before they can truly understand who they are together.

Sloane’s growth is particularly evident in her pursuit of a writing career, which allows her to channel her emotions into a creative outlet, helping her better understand her desires and needs. Ethan’s self-discovery, on the other hand, is expressed through his willingness to seek therapy and confront the emotional wounds that have shaped him.

Their relationship is a mirror of their personal development—both need to figure out who they are as people before they can truly be with someone else. The theme emphasizes the importance of self-awareness in creating meaningful, lasting partnerships.

It suggests that personal growth, while sometimes painful, is necessary for a relationship to thrive and evolve.

Revisiting the Past and the Power of Closure in Moving Forward

The final theme to be explored is the power of revisiting the past in order to find closure and move forward. The narrative structure of Call It What You Want—which flips between the past and present—underscores the significance of closure for both Sloane and Ethan.

Their past, filled with miscommunications and unspoken feelings, lingers in their minds, affecting their present interactions. The process of reconnecting and discussing their history is crucial for them to fully understand each other and redefine their relationship.

By confronting their past mistakes, misunderstandings, and regrets, they are able to let go of the weight of “what could have been” and create something new. This theme is crucial because it reveals that closure does not always come easily or quickly, but it is a necessary step toward emotional freedom and the ability to move forward.

The narrative ultimately shows that closure is not about erasing the past but about acknowledging it, learning from it, and choosing to move on with a clearer understanding of oneself and one’s desires.