It’s All Relative Summary, Characters and Themes

It’s All Relative by Rachel Magee is a contemporary romance novel that navigates the complexities of family dynamics, relationships, and personal growth.  The story centers on Helena Crosby, a high school English teacher, who is preparing for her mother’s wedding to a man whose family seems perfect in every way.

As Helena struggles with her sense of belonging, she finds solace in the company of her best friend, Landon Blake, and a series of unexpected encounters that lead her to question her life choices and feelings.  The book explores the deep connections that evolve through time, self-discovery, and the intricate relationships between friends, family, and lovers.

Summary

Helena Crosby, a high school English teacher, is gearing up for the summer and anticipating a much-needed vacation with her best friend, Landon Blake, to a tropical island.  But her excitement is tempered by the upcoming wedding of her mother, Nora, to Steve, whose family, dubbed “The Perfects,” appears flawless in every aspect of life.

Helena, who feels like the odd one out, fears that she will not fit into their picture-perfect world.  She hopes Landon will join her at the wedding, not only for support but also as a distraction from her anxieties about the event.

Though Helena and Landon have been friends for years, their relationship is complicated by a past romance that ended without much closure.  Their shared history, combined with their platonic bond, brings an underlying tension as they navigate their interactions.

After some convincing, Landon agrees to accompany Helena to the wedding, on the condition that she will let go of her lingering feelings for someone else’s fiancé.  Helena reluctantly agrees, focusing on her plan to survive the wedding and get through it with Landon by her side.

As the wedding approaches, Helena’s insecurities continue to rise.  She fears being judged by Steve’s perfect family, especially her soon-to-be stepsister, Amelia, who has a life that seems more polished and successful than her own.

Helena is also struggling with a secret crush on Amelia’s fiancé, Gage.  She feels the weight of comparison and doubts her own worthiness in the midst of it all.

Helena’s anxiety is further fueled by her constant comparisons between her chaotic, imperfect life and the seemingly perfect world of the Maddox family.  She worries about losing her mother to this new, idealized family dynamic and hopes that Landon will be there to ground her emotionally.

Despite the tension, Helena finds comfort in Landon’s unwavering support, though the unresolved history between them looms large in their interactions.

Meanwhile, Gage Demetrius, Amelia’s fiancé, feels increasingly alienated from Amelia and her family.  He spends time at Driftwood, a place where he can escape the escalating tension and reflect on his own emotions.

Gage feels the weight of being caught between his loyalty to Amelia and the sense of being an outsider in her world, particularly as his relationship with her begins to feel more like a routine rather than a deep connection.  Gage’s calm, dependable nature contrasts with the emotional turbulence he faces as he tries to support Amelia through her stress.

During a chance encounter with Helena on the beach, Gage finds solace in their brief but meaningful conversation.  The two bond over their shared frustrations, with Helena opening up about feeling out of place in the Maddox family and Gage acknowledging the growing distance between him and Amelia.

Their time together, though brief, offers both of them a temporary reprieve from the emotional weight of their situations.

As the wedding rehearsal approaches, Helena’s feelings of inadequacy intensify.  She struggles with her perceived lack of contribution to the wedding preparations and with her sense of being disconnected from the family.

Despite Nora’s insistence that she be involved, Helena feels like an outsider.  She takes a break by going for a run, where she unexpectedly encounters Gage again.

The two share a run together, and their conversation turns to the challenges they are both facing—Helena’s rejection from a summer program and Gage’s frustrations with Amelia’s family dynamics.  During their conversation, Helena opens up about her longing to make something of her life, feeling the pressure to do something significant but unsure of how to achieve it.

Amelia, on the other hand, is grappling with her own stress regarding the wedding and her family’s expectations.  She has been offered her dream job in architecture but is hesitant to take it due to her responsibilities toward her family.

Amelia’s inner conflict adds to the already strained relationships, particularly with Helena, who feels like she is competing for her place in the family.

In a pivotal moment, Gage and Helena share a moment of understanding, both offering each other support as they navigate their personal struggles.  Their conversation deepens their connection, with Gage offering reassurance and Helena finding comfort in his perspective.

Meanwhile, Amelia continues to deal with her own internal battles, questioning her worth and dealing with her feelings of inadequacy.

The emotional tension between Helena and Amelia continues to grow as both women grapple with their respective challenges.  Helena feels torn between her desire for acceptance and her struggle with the unrealistic standards set by the Maddox family.

Amelia, too, feels caught between her ambitions and her obligations, further straining her relationship with Gage.

As the story progresses, both Helena and Gage find themselves at a crossroads in their lives.  Helena’s connection with Gage deepens, and she begins to question her feelings for him.

Despite the emotional weight of the wedding and the family drama, Gage and Helena find comfort in each other’s company, slowly acknowledging the underlying sparks between them.

Meanwhile, Amelia’s relationship with Gage reaches a breaking point, as she finally admits to breaking up with him before they were reunited.  Though Gage sympathizes with her, he also realizes that the emotional distance between them is too great to overcome.

Their time together in the wilderness serves as a backdrop for the unspoken feelings and regrets that both characters carry.

In the end, Helena begins to find clarity about her place in the world and her relationships with those around her.  As the novel concludes, she takes steps toward embracing her true self and letting go of the need for validation from others.

The journey of self-discovery is mirrored in Gage’s own path toward understanding what truly matters in his life.  The novel ends on a hopeful note, with the characters looking forward to what lies ahead, both in their relationships and in their personal growth.

Characters

Helena Crosby

Helena Crosby is a high school English teacher whose character exudes a complex mixture of optimism, insecurity, and longing.  At the start of the story, she is eager for the summer break, but her excitement stems from more than just the vacation—it is also a means of escaping the emotional turbulence of her family dynamics, particularly concerning her mother’s upcoming wedding to a man with a “perfect” family.

Helena’s internal conflict revolves around her feelings of inadequacy when compared to the flawless lives of her soon-to-be stepfamily, whom she refers to as “The Perfects.”  Her struggles are compounded by her deep-seated fears about her relationship with her mother and the potential loss of closeness once her mother marries Steve.

Despite her anxieties, Helena finds comfort in the friendship of Landon Blake, who serves as both her emotional anchor and her confidant.  Throughout the book, Helena’s growth is shaped by her interactions with others, particularly with Landon and Gage.

While she tries to maintain a sense of independence and self-assurance, the emotional challenges she faces—coupled with her own doubts and insecurities—create a compelling portrait of a woman struggling to reconcile her self-worth with the expectations placed upon her by her family.

Gage Demetrius

Gage Demetrius is a calm and steady character who finds solace in the ocean, embodying the qualities of a dependable, supportive figure who is often caught in the crossfire of family tensions.  Throughout the story, Gage’s primary role is that of a loving partner to Amelia, although his own internal struggles complicate this dynamic.

He finds peace in the quiet of nature, particularly in moments spent alone, contemplating his life and the challenges around him.  Gage’s relationship with Amelia is characterized by a sense of emotional distance, as he becomes increasingly aware of the growing rift between them.

Although he remains supportive of her, he begins to question whether their connection is based on genuine affection or merely a result of shared responsibilities.  Despite his internal conflicts, Gage offers Helena the understanding and support she so desperately seeks, creating a temporary escape from the tension she feels within her family.

Their interactions, particularly their time spent together in “The Bungalow,” allow Gage to reflect on his own need for emotional fulfillment, while also offering Helena a sense of reassurance.  His character is a reflection of someone trying to balance duty with the desire for a deeper, more authentic connection.

Amelia Maddox

Amelia Maddox, Gage’s fiancée, is a character who navigates the intricate web of familial expectations, personal desires, and emotional turmoil.  At the start of the story, Amelia is under immense pressure due to her family’s expectations surrounding her wedding, and she struggles to reconcile her responsibilities with her own ambitions.

Amelia’s internal conflict is primarily driven by her desire to pursue her dream job in architecture, but she is reluctant to prioritize her personal goals over the needs of her family.  This creates a sense of unease, as she grapples with her growing resentment and guilt about potentially letting down those she loves.

Amelia’s relationship with her stepfamily is fraught with tension, and her anxiety increases as the wedding approaches.  Her connection to Helena is strained, with both women feeling the weight of their differing personal struggles.

However, Amelia’s relationship with Landon takes center stage in several key moments of the story.  As she contemplates her past with Landon, she admits that if he had asked her to stay, she would have chosen him over her previous commitments.

This unresolved tension highlights the emotional complexity of her character, as she remains torn between the past and her current situation, searching for a sense of fulfillment that continues to elude her.

Landon Blake

Landon Blake is a character who serves as a constant in Helena’s life, acting as her best friend and emotional confidant.  Though he harbors feelings for Helena that have never been fully explored, their shared history and deep connection allow him to play a pivotal role in her emotional journey.

Landon is portrayed as a pragmatic and thoughtful individual, someone who is attuned to the feelings of those around him, especially Helena.  His willingness to support her through the impending challenges with her family demonstrates his loyalty and affection for her, even though they both understand that their past romantic involvement was fleeting.

Throughout the story, Landon is depicted as a person who is caught in the delicate balance between his own desires and the needs of those he cares about, particularly when it comes to Amelia and Helena.  His bond with Amelia, which is rooted in shared history and past romantic feelings, adds a layer of complexity to his interactions with both women.

Despite the emotional distance that exists between him and Amelia, Landon continues to support her during her difficult moments, revealing his genuine care and empathy.  Landon’s character arc ultimately hinges on his unspoken feelings for Helena and the eventual realization that he must confront these emotions to move forward in his relationships.

Nora Crosby

Nora Crosby, Helena’s mother, serves as both a catalyst for the plot and a source of emotional conflict for Helena.  Though Nora is presented as a well-meaning, supportive figure, her upcoming marriage to Steve creates a rift between her and her daughter.

Nora’s desire to make her wedding a picture-perfect event exacerbates Helena’s feelings of inadequacy, as Helena struggles to find her place within the family dynamic.  Nora’s insistence that Helena help with the wedding preparations highlights her expectation for her daughter to fit into the mold of perfection that Nora has set for herself.

While Nora is clearly unaware of the emotional turmoil this causes Helena, her character is emblematic of someone who is focused on maintaining a sense of order and control, even at the expense of her relationship with her daughter.  Throughout the story, Nora’s well-intentioned but oblivious actions contribute to the growing tension between her and Helena, ultimately forcing Helena to confront her own feelings of displacement and her fear of losing her connection to her mother.

Steve Maddox

Steve Maddox, Nora’s fiancé, represents the idealized vision of a perfect family that Helena fears she cannot fit into.  His calm demeanor and polished exterior make him an intimidating presence for Helena, who is already grappling with feelings of insecurity.

Though Steve’s role in the story is largely peripheral, his relationship with Nora and his connection to the Maddox family serve as a backdrop for Helena’s emotional struggles.  Steve’s perfection, both in terms of his own accomplishments and the seemingly flawless nature of his family, only exacerbates Helena’s fear of not measuring up.

His character is a reflection of the type of perfection that Helena feels alienated from, and his involvement in the wedding acts as a reminder of everything Helena feels she lacks.  While Steve is not a deeply explored character, his impact on the plot is significant, particularly in how he shapes Helena’s emotional journey throughout the story.

Themes

Self-Worth and Personal Identity

Helena’s journey is marked by her constant struggle with her sense of self-worth, particularly in relation to the people around her.  She has always felt somewhat out of place in her family, especially in the context of her soon-to-be stepfamily, the “Perfects.

” Her perception of herself as imperfect, in comparison to Steve’s flawless family, fuels her insecurities.  This theme of self-worth goes beyond the superficial comparison of achievements and physical appearance; it delves into how Helena measures her value against others’ seemingly perfect lives.

Despite the exterior confidence she portrays, her underlying fears of not measuring up, of being inadequate, and of being emotionally disconnected, dominate her thoughts and actions.  Helena feels distant from her mother, who seems to embrace a new life with her perfect fiancé, and fears the growing divide between them.

This anxiety affects her emotional wellbeing, making her feel like an outsider in a family that should, ideally, provide her with support.  Helena’s emotional turmoil becomes a source of tension throughout the story, especially as she grapples with the dissonance between the life she wants and the role she feels forced into by her family’s expectations.

At the same time, the novel contrasts this sense of inadequacy with Helena’s deep connections to other characters, like Landon and Gage, whose presence offers her a sense of belonging.  These relationships highlight how personal identity is often shaped by the interactions we have with others and how important it is to feel understood, accepted, and supported.

However, Helena’s struggle to find peace with herself is an ongoing process, influenced by how others perceive her, and this theme of self-worth drives her emotional journey throughout the story.

Family Dynamics and Expectations

Family dynamics play a pivotal role in shaping the emotional and relational developments of the characters.  For Helena, the dynamics of her mother’s upcoming wedding are fraught with complications.

She feels out of place in the family of her soon-to-be stepfather, Steve, and his children, whom she refers to as “The Perfects. ” This juxtaposition of Helena’s chaotic life and their seemingly perfect one sets the stage for her feelings of alienation.

The pressure to fit in with Steve’s family becomes a central source of anxiety for her, creating emotional tension not only within her but also between her and her mother.  Helena’s mom, Nora, is preoccupied with the wedding and her new life with Steve, leaving Helena to navigate her discomfort alone.

This imbalance in the relationship deepens when Helena begins to question her mother’s priorities, feeling as though she is being sidelined in favor of this new family unit.

The impact of family dynamics extends beyond Helena and touches other characters, including Gage and Amelia.  Gage’s relationship with his fiancée, Amelia, is also strained due to the pressures of family expectations, particularly surrounding the wedding.

The novel explores how these pressures shape the choices and behaviors of individuals.  For example, Amelia is torn between her family’s needs and her own aspirations.

The family’s influence on their emotional state is not limited to surface-level events, but deeply affects how they perceive themselves and their roles within the family.  In this sense, It’s All Relative demonstrates that family dynamics are rarely simple; they come with emotional baggage that impacts how characters navigate their own desires, goals, and identity.

Romance and Emotional Connections

Romantic relationships serve as an important backdrop to the unfolding drama in the story, especially in the complex connection between Helena, Landon, and Gage.  At the heart of this theme is the dynamic between Helena and Landon, who share a platonic friendship but have a shared history of romantic involvement.

Their relationship is complicated by unspoken feelings and emotional baggage, with both characters carrying a sense of unresolved longing for what they had but failed to pursue.  The deep bond they share becomes a source of emotional support for Helena as she faces the tumultuous events surrounding her mother’s wedding, and Landon offers her comfort in a way that others cannot.

Yet, the tension in their relationship lies in their inability to address their past fully, leaving both of them uncertain about their feelings for each other.

On the other hand, Gage’s relationship with Amelia is one built on stability and comfort but is slowly unraveling due to growing emotional distance.  Despite their efforts to maintain a calm and dependable front, both characters struggle with feelings of being disconnected.

Gage’s inner conflict about his relationship with Amelia represents the tension between duty and genuine emotional connection.  Though he supports Amelia, he begins to question whether their bond is rooted in real affection or merely in the expectations of family and social duty.

This exploration of romantic relationships underscores the tension between what is expected and what is emotionally fulfilling.  The connections between characters evolve as they explore their deeper feelings, revealing that love and romance are often complex and, at times, laden with unspoken emotions, regrets, and the challenge of moving past old wounds.

Personal Growth and Self-Discovery

The theme of self-discovery is particularly prominent in the journey of Helena, who is constantly reassessing her identity, values, and sense of purpose.  From the moment she steps into her mother’s wedding preparation, she feels out of place and inadequate, both as a daughter and a person.

Her struggle to understand her role within her family and to find fulfillment in her own life drives much of her emotional turmoil.  Yet, as the story progresses, she embarks on a journey of self-growth, prompted by the relationships she forms with characters like Gage and Landon.

These connections force her to reflect on her desires and aspirations, pushing her to confront the feelings of inadequacy that have always plagued her.

In parallel, Gage’s personal journey also centers around self-discovery, albeit through the lens of his relationship with Amelia.  His constant emotional support for her leads him to question whether he is truly living for himself or merely fulfilling an expected role in the relationship.

The emotional distance he begins to feel with Amelia causes him to reassess his own desires and what truly matters in life.  Both Helena and Gage’s journeys reflect the broader theme of personal growth, where they are forced to confront their emotional complexities and come to terms with what they want from life and relationships.

Their evolving understanding of themselves is a process that unfolds throughout the novel, marked by moments of realization and vulnerability.